Singapore’s education system is rated as one among the best in the world. Singapore’s literacy rates have grown over the years and the students are amongst the best world over when rated at international exams.
It is very common for Singaporean parents to enrol their children for enrichment activities at very tender ages. These parents opt for books over the outdoors for their children to make sure they benefit from enrichment activities. Singapore’s government schools hold two major exams each year, and in addition, students are expected to do tests each month to help track their progress.
This can cause a lot of pressure for many students due to the expectations placed on them by their parents as well wanting a better future for themselves; all this is determined by their performance in the main exams.
Most parents in Singapore, want the best for their children so they end up enrolling them after school hours to help polish up their Mathematics and English skills with private tuition lessons. Singaporean parents are often strict with their children and they know the importance of hard-work and discipline comes first followed by rewards. This can often times that the children are pushed beyond the healthy studying limits. Below are some of the behaviours displayed by very demanding parents.
Unrealistic Expectations
Parents who are exceedingly demanding wish for their children to do extremely well in all areas and at the same time reach over and above their potential. Such parents ensure they know their children’s class schedule and any additional enrichment activity they can get for their children.
The enrichment activities range from music classes, tuition and any program that guarantees their children’s increase in memory power. This type of a parent also sets very high standards of educational excellence, accepting high test scores and not making room for anything less. The child’s personality and educational interest and capabilities are often not taken into consideration since the parent chooses what the child is to study.
All Work and No Play
Children of overly demanding parents often end up devoting most of their time for hard work for them to reach the exceedingly high standards set by their parents. Each night of the week and weekends are engaged with classes and any free time is used for homework and revision.
Children with overly demanding parents hardly get time for family meals or outings. These children get no time to share and do enjoyable things with their parents. An overly demanding parent, outdoors and playtime for their children does not feature anywhere in their fully planned schedule. For these types of parents, it’s all about studying and more studying which leads to high-stress levels for their children.
Extreme Commitment
Demanding parents are extremely devoted role models, who by being part of the volunteer parent system are well aware of how the school works. This can pose a challenge to other parents who are rather laid back in the way they handle their children’s academic performance. The overly demanding parents tend to be involved in all school projects and constantly finding ways that their children can gain recognition amongst their peers.
Rules, Rules, and Rules
The overly demanding parents run households that uplift the word discipline. Rule and regulations are detailed and rigid. Computer time for a child is limited and punishments are dished out for the slightest of mistakes. Although routine and clear boundaries help a child thrive, children from overly strict households end up acting more like soldiers than what children should be like.
They tend to overrule a child’s decision even when it comes to personal taste issues like music, literature, and TV. These parents even control the children’s friendships going to extents of barring them from meeting up with their friends after school hours. Children of overly demanding parents hardly give their opinions since their parents do not consider them and only end up going by what they, the parents, assume to be best for their children.
Disconnected
The relationship between a demanding parent and their child is often times very strained. Children of demanding parents choose not to involve their parents in their personal life since they had grown accustomed to their parent being an authoritarian rather than being a sympathetic mentor.
They would rather keep their personal matters to themselves as a way of avoiding criticism and intrusion from their parents. Children need to be empowered and trusted by parents that they will make the right decisions in life. This is an important life skill. The disconnected relationship between parent-child is hard to mend as the child has already formed a certain impression of his parent making their interaction minimal and somewhat distant.
Conclusion
Singapore’s education system is considered amongst one of the best worlds over. This often times means more pressure for students as they are expected to maintain the high levels of excellence or make them better. Even with the best of intentions for their children, Singaporean parents further enrol their children to extra enrichment activities and tuition and often introduce to the children at a very young age.
The parents mostly choose books and studies over the outdoor activities for their children. For most children means, their schedules are often swamped with class work and after school hours are busy with tuition and enrichment activities. The over demanding parents ensure they set rules and detailed regulations in their households. This regulations and rules only serve to uphold the parent’s high standards of academic excellence and no play time for their children. This sort of environment wears down the parent-child relationship, creating a big irreparable rift. A child finds it hard to open up to a domineering parent and this can worsen when the child’s opinion and desires are overlooked; which is often what overly demanding parents do.
It is hardly surprising when a child gets depressed and breakdown at school when they can’t cope with their parent’s high expectations and instead of seeking help, he may choose to take a disastrous path instead.
You may enjoy these articles as well: Parents’ Top Tips For Partnering With Your Child’s Teacher and Why Parents Find Home Tuition in Singapore – 5 Practical Reasons.
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